Now I've seen it all. First there were the giant inflatable snowmen. Then the inflatable Homers dressed as Santa....then came the inflatable jack-o-lantern towers and spiders, along with the inflatable US flags for all of the hillbillie Bush supporters out there. Now, just the other day- I see a giant inflatable Turkey. Now, Christmas has become, by design, a holiday of consumption and decorating, so I can see the natural progression to fantastically garish decorations such as the snowmen, and to an even higher level of gaudishness, the Homer Santa. The giant inflatable pumpkin towers and spiders fall into the same regression, since people decorate for Halloween as well. Now as for the flags, I guess it was only a matter of time before 'Giant Inflatable Pieces of Shit, Inc.' decided to capitalize on the stupidity of patriotic rednecks. But the Turkey!?! Come on! If there was one Holiday left in this country that has withstood the commercial onslaught, it has been Thanksgiving. Not anymore, apparently. Who the FUCK would put a giant, flightless bird filled with hot air in their yard? Are you trying to get your neighbors to move away? Are you that desperate to waste your money on useless garbage? If there is one thing left that this country is best at, its our penchant for rediculously tasteless lawn ornaments- I think we still have the market cornered on that one. First came the plastic pink flamingos, then the fake geese and deer, and now this. Ah yes....what is more American than putting tacky inflatable lawn ornaments in front of your house to piss off your neighbors? No wonder there are so many shootings in this country. I think if one of my neigbors whipped one of those out- the Turkey especially- I would be inclined to perform a drive by....if for no other reason than to put a hole in the fucking thing rendering it useless. If the jackass that put it up in the first place happens to get caught in the crossfire, then so be it.

0 comments from the peanut gallery